Finding the Balance at Christmas
Finding the Balance at Christmas
Christmas used to feel simple. When I was younger, the biggest challenge was staying awake at work after a late night out. I could walk into the office with a quick spray of cologne, pretend everything was fine, and hope no one noticed the glow in the dark stamp on my hand. Today if I stayed up all night, I would look like I had been through a natural disaster and probably feel worse.
Most of my high school friends are grandparents now. I am still figuring out toddler bedtime. Their grandkids and my kids are the same age, which is a strange reality to process. Life took me the long way around. I built my career, moved across the country, bought and sold homes, and then finally started my family in my forties. I am grateful for how it worked out, but parenting later in life comes with a unique set of questions I never expected to spend so much time thinking about. One of the biggest ones arrives every December: Christmas gifts.
When Your Kids “Need” Nothing
When you can afford to buy your children what they want, you sometimes do it without thinking. Not because they need it, but because you can. Then you look around the house and realize the excitement fades fast and the clutter lasts forever.
My boys “need” nothing. Matteo’s birthday was only a few months ago. We went all in on Paw Patrol. Today the whole collection sits untouched. Antonio is young enough that everything feels new, but even he loses interest quicker than I expect.
I read something recently about how children play more when they have less. That idea made sense. We donated and stored more than half of the toys in the house. The change was immediate. The house felt calmer. They played longer. It reminded me of the message in the gratitude book: joy has less to do with things and more to do with being together.
Gratitude, Generosity, and What We Give
The generosity theme from the Christmas book also keeps showing up. Generosity is not only about giving to others. It is about slowing down long enough to see the effect of what you choose to give.
When I think about gifts for the boys, I want to model that. Choosing with intention. Choosing things that encourage them to share, explore, or play together. Choosing moments instead of piles.
Experiences sound perfect on paper, but at 19 months and 3 years, sometimes an “experience” is more exhausting than any toy I could buy. So the balance is real.
Where I Am Landing This Year
Here is where I am landing this year:
Keep Christmas simple
One or two meaningful gifts each
Choose toys that support creative or cooperative play
Add one small family experience
Focus on connection, not quantity
Parenting later in life gives you a different sense of time. You notice how quickly they grow and how fast interests change. Toys peak and fade. But the lessons stay: Inclusion, Gratitude, Generosity and soon, learning how to disagree respectfully. That book arrives in January, and I can already see how much that theme plays out daily in our home.
Some toys will be forgotten by mid January. I have accepted that. What I want them to remember is that Christmas was warm, simple, and grounded. That giving felt good. That gratitude mattered. That we were present with them, not just buying for them.
That is the kind of Christmas I want them to remember.
Any late in life parents out there have some advice? Please comment below…
